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Epiphany

U.S. readies "Iraqi PATRIOT Act" to protect democr

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Dont you just love satire?

B)

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----- Forwarded message from Tim May -----

From: Tim May

Subject: Model legislation proposed for Iraq

To: cypherpunks

Date: Wed, 9 Apr 2003 22:12:02 -0700

X-Mailer: Apple Mail (2.551)

BAGHDAD (Routers) -- A team of Coalition legislators, lawyers,

prosecutors, and judges has been air-dropped into Firbol Square to take

charge of Saddam's statue's head and to prepare Iraqi democracy for the

post-liberation era.

Copies of the suggested model legislation were distributed to reporters

outside the Tel Aviv Hotel (formerly the Palestine Hotel). Copies were

made on French copiers looted from the Ministry of Information.

Some of the items in the model legislation include:

* passage of the "Iraqi PATRIOT Act." This Act would ban speech deemed

harmful to the nation, would allow jailing of material witnesses and

other illegal combatants without charges, would declare Islam to be a

terror-related cult, and would basically be much more efficient that

the primitive tools used by Saddam.

* establishment of a dual-party system and the lobbyists and graft

collectors necessary to make such a system work. The names of the

parties have not been finalized, but at least one of them will likely

be called "The Republican Guard."

* a change in the name of the Ministry of Information to "Department of

Homeland Security." It is suggested that the current Minister of

Information, aka Baghdad Bob, be named Secretary of Homeland Security.

* restrictions on terrorist use of cryptography (in other words, use of

cryptography by non-governmental bodies).

* a national ID system based on the system in use in Coalition countries

* an extensive system of surveillance cameras similar to the one

deployed in the United Kingdom, a Coalition principal

* a recommendation that Al-Jazeera and Al-Arabia reporters face charges

of sedition for illegally reporting events not intended to be reported

* strong new restrictions on pornography, smut, and hate speech

* a nationwide smoking ban

[rest of model legislation at www.coalition.gov/ourplan]

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well all that work and it seems like nothing has changed!!

:lol::D

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